In love and in friendship, it is almost impossible to avoid clashes of views and behavioral patterns. Nonetheless, if you are calm and aware of such issues, you are more likely to handle them successfully. In this article we will explore common communication problems which students face.

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Issues in Love

Love is a wonderful feeling which makes a person happy and exalted. It triggers the release of endorphins and oxytocin which reduce stress, anxiety and can even help get rid of depression. Moreover, love stimulates the production of adrenaline which makes you eternally excited.

However, as a student, you are susceptible to falling into the friend zone category. You may think that you have an ideal relationship, but once you try to bring it on a new level, you may face unexpected resistance. In this case, you can try a couple things.

First of all, you can just let it be. Limerence or infatuation is a wonderful feeling, but, unlike real love, it is temporary. You may even try the good old “out of sight – out of mind” method. It worked for me before, and I used to have many crushes in my student years.

Secondly, you may resort to the scarcity principle – the idea that the less available something is, the more valuable it is perceived. Perhaps, in an attempt to be likable you did too much for your love interest. Try doing less or even disappear for some time. See if they care. However, do not expect it to work – it rarely does, but it is still worth trying.

Finally, try to find somebody else. It may sound like a sacrilege to you now, but there are many wonderful people out there. Simply trying to stay away from someone you like/love may be a real torture, but if you encounter a new love interest, the healing process will become much faster. So, stop worrying so much over issues in love and take action. Sooner or later you will find the right person for yourself.

Issues in Friendship

Even if you are not lovesick just yet, you may still struggle to acquire friends. There are a few things to consider when you want to form a good relationship with somebody. Here I will discuss the major ones.

First and foremost, you need to accept the fact that your friend may be different from you. Of course, if they are complete aliens, then you might want to consider breaking the connection altogether. However, if this person is your roommate, it is usually easier to learn how to deal with them.

Today’s world is characterized by the hegemony of the Internet which makes people more connected and paradoxically lonelier than ever before. Another horrible side effect is that we tend to form little like-minded groups where strangers are not allowed. Thus, we do not hear different opinions, indulging in our own limited world. This phenomenon is called cyberbalkanization, and it is very dangerous because in real life people are very unlikely to always agree with you.

Thus, if you want to become friends with somebody, you need to be more open towards the diversity of views. This way you will be able to preserve good relationships for a lifetime and have an easier time in college.

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